SAINT KILLDOZER HEROIC VILLAIN PROFILE
Anointing His Holiness Marvin Heemeyer the Patron Saint of Revenge
The Temple of Folk Heroes and Villains canonizes Marvin Heemeyer as the Patron Saint Killdozer of all Vengeances and Revenges. His revenge mission was meticulously planned and achieved the effect of terror and destruction that underlies any decent fanatical revenge fantasy.
His single-minded determination to a suicide mission of justice and raw revenge was a one-way Valhalla trip in the belly of a diesel beast. His mission forever draws the admiration of men and has earned him the status of an elite American folk hero.
Saint Killdozer holds the unique distinction and honor of being the only folk hero known to have welded himself into his own tomb.
Rust in peace, Killdozer!
SAINT KILLDOZER RANKS AND HONORS
Serial number: 503-68-9471
Rank: Battle Tank Commander
Beatific: Saint Killdozer, Patron Saint of all Vengeances and Revenges.
Title: Rumbling Juggernaut of Vengeance
Title: The Granby Crusher
Award: Super Villain of the Century
Award: The Bits & Pieces Prize
Status: Elite American Folk Hero
SAINT KILLDOZER AUDIO AND VIDEO DOCUMENTARY
Marvin Heemeyer Manifesto
SAINT KILLDOZER IMAGES
Killdozer pushes road grader like a rag doll:
Hacker tomb inside the killdozer
SAINT KILLDOZER CHARACTERISTICS, FEATS, STATISTICS
Weapon of choice: "MK Tank", which was a Komatsu D355A bulldozer modified with over 20 tons of armor.
Other weapons: 50 caliber sniper rifle.
Other weapons: .308 rifle.
Other weapons: .22 caliber rifle.
Other weapons: .357 magnum pistol.
Casualties: 1 (suicide) with a .357 magnum pistol.
Destruction: Over 7 million dollars in property damage, obliteration of several businesses and a total of 13 buildings ruined.
Swag factor: The highest swag factor for a self-made mechanical weapon of mass destruction ever devised to date. The extreme distinction of the weapon is its doubling as a tomb into which the hero welded himself. This was a no escape, no retreat, no surrender, no way out scenario which required unfathomable gravitas and commitment to certain death.
Achievement: Welding himself into his own coffin. Seriously.
Notables: SWAT demolition explosives were unable to breach or even damage the heavy armor of the killdozer. These explosive charges would have opened a Abrams Tank like a can of tuna but barely made a dent in the killdozer.
SAINT KILLDOZER QUOTES AND HOLY WRITINGS
"It is my duty. God asked me to do this. It's a cross that I am going to carry and I'm carrying it in God's name."
"I was always willing to be reasonable until I had to be unreasonable. Sometimes reasonable men must do unreasonable things."
"You meddled in my business, and took what I deserve away. You took advantage of my good nature. And another thing you should learn is that when you visit evil upon someone, be assured it will revisit you, and that is what is happening."
SAINT KILLDOZER HOLY RELICS
Scraps and parts of the MK Tank Killdozer.
Shell casings from the Killdozer guns.
Vials of holy motor oil and antifreeze from the Killdozer.
Original killdozer audio tapes.
The .357 magnum pistol which took the hero's life.
The .357 magnum suicide shell casing filled with holy kosher killdozer oil.